T for Tom

I Never Do What I Say

Posted in Europe, poem by johnsontoms on February 19, 2013

I never do what I say.

I come up with these wonderful ideas.

Things that sound wonderful –

Hiking the Slovenian mountains,

Writing in the bars of Prague, just like Kafka,

Walking the Villa Seurat and seeing the homes of Miller,

Hemingway,

Orwell,

Picasso.

Instead I get drunk.

I get drunk and I chase women, not always to success.

And when I do, I don’t know what it means.

Does it mean anything?

I never did what I wanted.

Or did I, and I just don’t know what I want?

Sometimes I Get Tired

Posted in Europe, poem by johnsontoms on February 19, 2013

Sometimes I get tired of walking around alone.

It’s okay at first

In a new place to see new things.

Walk into restaurants, stop at shops,

Buy things.

Figure out what’s next.

I always want to get a drink, find a girl

Give it a whirl.

But damn that gets old.

So fucking old.

I don’t mind being alone.

I think.

I think while I’m alone.

Sometimes too much.

I always think I need someone, not really sure why.

No one’s ever done anything for me.

Always me to them – time, money, love.

Give it all away and the only thing left is me,

Walking around alone.

Circles, it seems.

New places, same stories.

Am I different?

Yes.

But, I hope, not so much that I’ll always keep walking alone.

From the top of a mountain it’s nice.  Peaceful even.

Sitting on top of the world, legs swinging free,

The people below carrying on their merry way.

Doing this, doing that.  Eventually dying.

It’s sad really that no one will join me.

I’m in a pizzeria in Ljubljana, Slovenia

With a hangover and a beer.

Laško, it’s not that bad.

I just want to share it with someone.

“It says lager, but it’s a pilsner.”  That’s something I’d say.

Something…

Fuck, anything.

I don’t think that’s too much to ask.

Why does it always seem that way?

Everyone dies alone.